The shocking story of the Nottingham man, aged 66, whose poverty meant he was living in appalling conditions highlights an Age UK survey that showed a third of people aged 60 and over were worried about their heating bills.

It seems to this observer that the divisions between rich and poor get greater for those in older age.

The older rich can buy a satisfactory standard of living, can call on friends and family willing, if not happy, to help them.

The older poor are all too often isolated, lonely, confused and fearful and as a result live in increasingly desperate conditions.

An earlier blog described the baby boomers who were now planing for a better quality end of life experience as ‘superior seniors’. This definition now seems all too apt as it implies superiority and inferiority, or in this context, haves and have nots.

The blog also warned that the Big Society would ignore ‘superior seniors’ at its peril, pointing out that vociferous baby boomers, used to getting what they wanted, would complain loudly if excluded from Cameron’s ‘big tent’.

But who hears the voice of those less fortunate senior citizens who missed out on the baby boomers’ boom times and whose later years are spent alone, poor and without any influence?

This is where Age UK  must ensure its campaign against poverty in retirement is successful by publicising the plight of the large number of society’s impoverished senior members.

If the Big Society is to succeed, the poor elderly must be included, but this will present the Government with a major problem. The Big Society’s mission is to create a fairer country in which we all feel a sense of belonging without the impedence of complex legislation and bureaucratic administration.

But with two million of those in retirement not having enough money to cover basic food and fuel bills, let alone enjoy retirement, this will be a major redistribution of wealth requiring more than community self-help and middle class goodwill.

As those who stand to benefit - the isolated and poor elderly - have the least powerful voice and are easiest to ignore, their membership of the Big Society is by no means certain.

Those aware of the scale of the problems faced by the poor elderly must ensure they aren’t excluded from the coalition’s vision of how our society will be improved.

And you baby boomers, now affluent, influential and articulate, should remember that in your youth you campaigned for a fairer and more just society.

You now have just as important a cause to support and that is reducing the shocking and scandalous divide between the rich and poor older members of our socity.

You didn’t look away when you were teenagers…don’t ignore the suffering of your contemporaries now.

There is a societal change taking place which the Farewell Innovators (My Last Song included) are part of, and which the Dying Matters Coalition is heading.

It is the belated recognition that the baby boomer generation born in the two decades following the end of the second world war is now reaching the latter years of their lives and that their end of life expectations will need to be met.

It’s becoming rather un-PC to call them old, or elderly, not least because they don’t think they are. Indeed, with more people living to 100, those in their 60s and 70s aren’t really old any more.

More acceptable terms are elders, which has a ring of wisdom attached to it, and seniors which connotes greater experience.

Unlike the generations before them, this group – let’s call them superior seniors – will take more control of their end of life experiences. Baby boomers have been criticised for being the ‘me, me, me’ generation who get what they want.  This attitude isn’t going to change as baby boomers become superior seniors.

They will want better health care so they lead longer and healthier lives. They will want to be independent as long as possible, and when looked after will expect a higher standard of service from care providers.

When the end of their lives is approaching, they will want to be involved in the decisions previously taken by family members or their doctors about how much medical intervention they want to receive and where they want to die.

And when they die, they will want their lives to be remembered positively and uniquely with a high quality farewell ceremony or service.

Superior seniors will have learned from the end of life experiences of their parents’ generation and not been impressed by poor quality care delivery, hardly reassured by the NHS end of life medical care lottery and disappointed by anonymous, dreary send offs.

We are at a point when the future tense is changing to the present…time is passing, years are being added to the ages of the baby boomers. If not old, they are no longer young.

The farewell innovators are those companies and organisations who want to give this increasingly large market (by 2015 there will be well over ten million people aged 65 or older) a better farewell experience.

Central to this approach is the move towards a ‘good death’, the achieving of which is the purpose of the Dying Matters Coalition. It means the ailing patients, their families and their doctors have to address dying and death openly and positively to make the end of life experience as comfortable as possible. The My Last Song death plan is an holistic approach to organising a comfortable death.

While all this signals the retreat of the pervasive Anglo Saxon death taboo, superior seniors and the farewell innovators who wish to provide services for them should not be complacent.

Death is sad, upsetting, worrying and uncomfortable to discuss. It is often easier to ignore, but if not addressed, superior seniors can hardly complain if the end of life decisions are made by their families or health professionals, not always for the reasons they would have chosen.

As this government puts an inclusive, collaborative and mutually supportive Big Society at the top of its agenda, it must do more to encourage better living standards and the delivery of a ‘good’ death for the increasingly large numbers of superior seniors who will not expect to be left out of the tent.

AND stands for Allow Natural Death, and it’s a phrase that American researchers believe will catch on more than the current phrase, Do Not Resuscitate.

The issue about end of life medical treatment is as topical in the US as it is in this country.

In both societies, neither ailing older people nor their younger family members are comfortable talking about death. It’s therefore surrounded by fear of the unknown, and as nobody likes to talk of what they are afraid about, so the taboo about addressing death continues.

Usually late in the patient’s life, he or she will say that ‘I don’t want to be hooked up to lots of machines,’ or ‘I want it to happen quickly.’

How this view is communicated to the health professionals providing end of life treatment is again the subject of confusion and reluctance to address the issue. The patient’s life is therefore often unnecessarily prolonged, the family’s anguish stretches out and the medical staff are not certain how to proceed.

A simple form of words can change this, and the acronym AND is really very simple.

Research in the States has shown that the phrase Do Not Resuscitate is not used by many families because it is a negative and sounds scary, whereas Allow Natural Death (AND) connotes a positive, it implies permission.

It also gains plus points because it uses the word Natural, as in Natural Childbirth and Natural foods.

What starts in the US quickly cross the ‘pond’, and because part of My Last Song’s mission is to encourage people to address their later life decisions before it’s too late, we think AND should be adopted in the UK.

It will give impetus to the Dying Matters coalition’s goal of changing attitudes towards death, dying and bereavement and make it more likely that the patient, the patient’s family and the family GP will discuss the chosen end of life treatment.

My Last Song has created a Death Plan template, within the Lifebox, which makes it easier for people to make the decisions that will result in a ‘good death’. The old and terminally ill will be more in control of the end of life experience they want.

It will encourage families and GPs to talk about death and to plan for it thus reducing the fear of the unknown.

We only die once and, if possible, it should be the experience we want it to be.

Retirement often heralds the start of the most fulfilling period in many people’s lives. An article on My Last Song by life coach Paul Brown gives a few suggestions on how to achieve just that.

He starts by saying that successful people have a simple recipe for happiness – the pursuit of meaningful goals.

Life, he says, is a journey. If we know where we’re heading, it’s so much easier to take the directions that will take us there. It’s all too common to drift along without a clear destination but it’s never too late to pinpoint where we want to be and take action.

He gives four tips.

Tip One – Focus on What You Want!

Come up with a list of five things you’d like to happen in your life if a genie gave you five wishes.

As well as writing them down, share at least one with a friend or family member. They may even be able to help.

Tip Two – ‘Big Yourself Up!’

As a senior citizen you’re going to have more successes and achievements than most…write down as many as you can.

Experiences may include challenges that seemed problematic at the time, but that you managed to overcome. Once you’ve done that, have fun brainstorming how you could use them going forwards.

Tip Three – How to deal with your challenges

The conscious mind is poor at solving our challenges, plus it struggles with the concept of delegation.

Whatever the issue, write it down. Your subconscious mind will gladly accept the task and then work on a solution in the background. You’ll be busy doing something else and the solution will pop into your head.

Tip Four– Enlist the services of a life coach

Not surprisingly, Paul recommends employing someone who is an expert in helping you explore what you really want, and removing the barriers. It can be incredibly empowering to share one’s dreams (and issues) with a fellow human being. He says family can be judgemental, and so a life coach is the fellow human you need (and will pay for, of course).

I hope I don’t come across as too cynical. I asked Paul to contribute the article and I think it’s good.

More importantly, it has shown a large gap in the advice carried on My Last Song, and that is information aimed at the newly retired and active retired on how to make this period of their lives as successful, fulfilling and happy as possible.

Further contributions to meet this aim welcomed. The autumn of our years should be mellow, warm and fruitful.

In an article posted on My Last Song, the Reverend Peter Ratcliff, repudiates the ‘Princess Diana style’ modern funeral, saying it is “little better than an entertainment show”.

Reverend Ratcliff, minister at St John’s Church of England (Continuing), South Wimbledon and editor of the English Churchman, opposes the growing trend where the minister allows families to read poems and tributes, “thus becoming little more than a Master of Ceremonies.”

Reverend Ratcliff argues that “It is quite inappropriate to produce a ‘Princess Diana style’ modern funeral… The service is predominantly the worship of God and so needs to be led by a minister of God.”

According to Reverend Ratcliff, the place for members of the family to address other family and friends is at the reception that follows the funeral, not during the service.

He says that many of the mourners, lacking any knowledge of the Bible, will want the funeral to be “light and jolly”.

This, he says, “is a challenge, not an excuse to dumb down funeral services.”

To ensure the congregation understand the solemn nature of the service, “the minister should take the whole service himself without allowing family and friends to present poems and eulogies. It is his job and he should not hand it over to those who are not qualified.”

Reverend Ratcliff’s views fly in the face of the growing trend to mix secular elements with religious content at the request of the family.

This is known as a mix’n’match funeral, or the Modern British Funeral, and was institutionalised by the funeral of Princess Diana in September 1997.

Watched by millions around the world, the service included tributes read by both Diana’s sisters and a controversial address by her brother, Lord Spencer. Elton John played a re-worked version of Candle in the Wind.

The service was lead by the then Archbishop of Canterbury, Dr George Carey.

Reverend Ratcliff also believes burial is preferable to cremation, saying: “the language of being buried and raised with Christ is so beautifully illustrated at the grave and this leaves a lasting impression of a wonderful and sure hope.”